Tag Archives: marriage

Ride or Die is Overrated. Yeah, I said it.

adam levine

I was sitting in the car at a red light today, and Locked Away by R. City featuring Adam Levine came on the radio. And all of a sudden, I was furious. FURIOUS. IRATE. INCENSED. You get the picture. Here are the lyrics, just in case you’ve been living under a rock or you hate Adam Levine (who am I kidding…no one hates Adam Levine):

If I got locked away
And we lost it all today
Tell me honestly, would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly, would you still love me the same?
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My Heavenly Mother

If there’s one thing that stands out for me in the newly released essay on Heavenly Mother – is how little we know of Her. Officially. Doctrinally. And as I reflect on my lifetime in this church, I see how that not knowing has often translated into us just ‘not talking about Her’ and even, not thinking about Her. I’ve heard the reasons offered as to why of course. The conjecture. Including, ‘God wants to keep His wife protected from us…so Her name is not defiled…’ I remember hearing that in a Sunday School class once and being indignant enough about it that I spoke up – I disagree. My Heavenly Mother doesn’t need protecting or sheltering. She’s a GODDESS with powers equal to those of her husband. She could wipe us all out with a mere flick of her fingers. I’m not sure the class appreciated my contribution!

Today’s essay got me thinking about Heavenly Mother. Who and what she is to me.  She’s different things to me at different times.

'Nafanua' - as imagined by photographer Jordan Kwan, model Faimasenu'u Zita Martel.

‘Nafanua’ – as imagined by photographer Jordan Kwan, model Faimasenu’u Zita Martel.

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‘Children are a heritage of the Lord.’

Content Warning – sexual abuse, discussion of HOW to prevent abuse esp within a Samoan/Pasifika context.

When I was twenty, I told my husband Darren, something I’d never told anybody else. I told him that when I was little, somebody over time, had done bad things to me. Then they threatened me. They said, ‘don’t tell anyone or you’ll be in big trouble.

I was scared, sore and ashamed. I was seven. I believed him. Continue reading